This weekend I dipped back into my roots. I have this thing for Jamaican roots plays; they’re exciting to me mainly because of the ratchet storylines and 5 minute interval punch lines. I get an ab workout by sitting on my behind, it’s wonderful.
A couple years back it would be tradition for me to visit the local flea market on the weekends and pick up a stack of new Jamaican movies and plays; I really need to start going again because girl I’ve been missing out.
My aunt showed me a new movie called “Mi Want Mi Cow Foot”. Cow foot is a national Jamaican dish I refuse to touch, yuck. Cowfoot is also slang for Penis, and probably a big one too, now that is more delectable, right ladies?
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So I watched this movie and I never felt so violent towards the sisterhood in all my life. I’m going to put the link to the movie in the body of this email but shoot since I know you may or may not watch it- Let me just give you the short version.
Woman is pregnant she nags baby father to go find work, baby father keeps telling pregnant girlfriend that he is going to look work but he is really working in another woman’s bed. Ghetto loud violent friend (a male actor dressed as a woman) of pregnant woman tells pregnant woman and a love triangle beat down ensues.
Of course both women still want their cowfoot *rolls eyes*. A bunch of fights, jokes, and other stuff I would never be caught doing takes place. A few wigs are thrown, clothes are torn, and sticks are thrown. It was like a marriage between Disney land, acid and crushed dreams.
I realize that the culture is different in Jamaica. Some women are actually content with staying home, being disrespected and fighting for a cheating piece of cowfoot with another woman- NOT I!
I don’t think I’m better than any woman, who would engage in a wig throwing, clothes tearing, sticks wielding fiasco over a man but I’m sure as hell not participating in that class and neither should you!
As always no matter what we go through in life or experience there are lessons to be learned from everything and I mean everything….even a piece of wutless cowfoot!
My takeaways from cowfoot:
- As a woman you must always have a hustle even if you mainly keep house. Sell your services even if it’s cleaning and cooking for others. Make sure you have your own side savings.
- Never fight another woman for a man. Let her have him, there is plenty of cowfoot (respectable) in the sea and wait, does size really matter anyway? Any man who is comfortable with pinning two women against each other needs help, you’re not a therapist.
- Stop jumping in like Captain Sisterhood Thugstress for your friends. If your friend is going through a situation and you have been honest as can be about how you feel she should handle a situation step away and give her space to fight her own battles. It has been my experience that you can talk all the Rev Run wisdom into your girl’s head and she will go back at least 3 more times for the abuse and disrespect. You will also have to accept if she doesn’t leave. It hurts and by nature we want to fix problems, but the best thing you can do for a friend who is in an unhealthy relationship is listen and be patient or in extreme cases distance yourself.
- Learn to take an L. In 2013 there is no time to gather the village to go after a woman who your man is cheating on…no time at all. We’re not going to win the hearts and loyalty of everyone who comes into our lives. Be graceful and fierce, walk away from what does not serve your purpose. You DO NOT need to fix it or get even, that’s child’s play.
That’s it. Below is the link to the movie, yes it’s on Youtube. There is nothing I can’t find online these days, nothing.
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