goddess intellect

What a morbid title. I tried to name it something more pleasant I really did, especially since its love candy hearts naked booty cupid day but I simply could not.

This weekend in case you were engulfed in saran wrap hiding in a dark closet with beats by Dre headphones on, the legendary Whitney Houston passed away. The cause of death is slowly being unraveled to the public, but I think we all have an idea of what really went down. News of her sudden death affected me, more than I’d like to admit. No, I did not know this woman personally. Yes, I grew up to her angelic power house of a voice, and I most certainly wanted to be like her in every way but one.

Since I had guests over that evening, the next day I grieved. Part of that led me to watch the 2009 Whitney Houston “comeback” and interview on the Oprah show season premiere. Her interview for the most part disturbed me, the details of her relationship with drugs and Bobby Brown made me sick to my stomach.

What disturbed me even more was that this woman did not know her own power, even to the day of her death. She felt immense pressure from the public and her “team” to make a comeback. Why a talent so stellar would need to make a comeback to blend with modern days artists on the billboards is beyond me.

Tears rolled down my face as she said that all she wanted to do is move to an island with her daughter and have a fruit stand.

What was so wrong with her desire to disappear from the glitz and glam of Hollywood and live a more simple life? Why didn’t she just sell her shit, jump on a plane and explore the world on her own terms?

Yes, there was the drug addiction, low self-esteem and abusive relationship, but I believe Whitney became accustomed to such a self-destructive lifestyle because of her people pleasing tendencies.

I’m telling you right now a comeback and attempting to relive glory days is one of the worst forms of people pleasing on this planet. Yes we are all given gifts and talents, but I find that we place so much validity in occupation and not enough in experiences that make us happy. Yes, she was “the voice” but she was also an individual with desires of her own.

The perception of the general public is that money, accolades and being the top shotta makes you happy, but in essence things that make you happy cannot be placed in your wallet: peace of mind, love, family, laughter, life experiences, and memories.

If you’ve ever felt pressure by anyone to uphold a certain image, or fulfill a dream or live a lifestyle that you weren’t feelin, then you know what Whitney may have been going through. If you’re experiencing this right now, I urge you take life into your own hands and try your utmost best to live for yourself. People will always expect us to live and behave a particular way because it gives them comfort, but at the end of the day if you’re sitting with a pickle up your butt and the other people are chillin, who is to blame for this uncomfortable pickle up the butt feeling………

Not the most elegant comparison but as usual IDGAF because it makes perfect sense to me.

Thoughts?

I’d love to read them.

P.S Oh and if you have people pleasing tendencies here is an excellent article, “21 Tips To Stop Being A People Pleaser”. I have these tendencies and found that the content in this article helped a lot!..Hey I might write about this tomorrow. Happy Vday to all, love you <3

P.P.S- Praying for Bobbi Kristina during this rough time