The Great Sexy Sexual Debate
First off I’d like to thank folks for their feedback on the pictures I posted a couple days ago, positive and negative. For the record, I’m not tryna become a model, a video girl, a porn star none of that. I write muthafucka, I write. And I’m hoping one day soon to venture into the wonderful world of column writing, which involves presenting an image that readers will gravitate towards. Yea that image is a mix of sexy and smarts, that’s what I bring to the table. If you’ve ever had a conversation with me you’ll know that I always throw an element of sex in the mix. Not because I necessarily want to bed all those I have conversations with, it’s just that I’m comfortable with my sexuality and I enjoy talking about sex. A few friends of mine who are not regular blog readers who saw the pictures commented and said that it was difficult to recognize me in the pictures, not because of the physical appearance but because of the seductress I portray in the photographs. They said they were not used to seeing that side of me. I wasn’t offended but I thought about my relationship with those friends, first off they have children, I’m not about to sexy talk around kids and secondly if you don’t initiate the topic of sex and never do, I’m not about to impose my will upon you. I can thrive in conversations that are not sex-related…I’m multi-dimensional Freak-um Friday does not embody me.
So what am I tryna get at?
Sexy and Sexual. All of us have come across some women (and men) who can walk into a room and make heads turn. They may not necessarily be dressed in a provocative manner, they may not be the most statuesque, but their body language, and their facial expression suggests sex. There are other individuals who you will not be able to pick up a sexual vibe from even if you were to engage in a conversation about sex. Then you have the individuals who smell of sex literally and figuratively, in fact that’s the only message they radiate. What constitutes sexy for you as an individual? And when does it become overtly sexual? As in I am ready to disrespect this person if they were to give it up type sexual?
Ok the third question is extreme, but we sub-consciously think it? I think there is thin line between sexy and slutty. I believe that when a person is sexy they are pleasant, refreshing, and charismatic. But when the line is crossed slutty is exposed, vulnerable, and cheap.
Don’t get me wrong, we all have our “slutty” moments, its encouraged from time to time right? But what does it for you? When is line broken between slutty and sexy? Let’s talk about it.
Too sexy for this blog,
Goddess Intellect
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Love the way you ended it: “Too sexy for this blog”
I think the line between sexy and slutty are clear.
For example when I go out: If I wear jeans the girls have to me “poppin” in a class manner.
But not in some see thru shirt w/o a bra..that’s slutty. Or wearing short shorts with ya cheeks hanging out.
But thats my opinion. I hope I answered your question.
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 11:16 am
See, if this were a v-log I’d be voguing and singing “I’m too sexy for this blog”…but I shan’t.
So I’m getting that mystery and shape as being your definition of Sexy…because with the girls “popping” but flesh not being visible like in the cheeks hanging out of the short shorts, you ignite the senses?
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Nightfall Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
Then vlog dammit. lol
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
You first
sunnydelyte21 Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 2:33 pm
I’m slow what it vlog (video blog)???
Nightfall Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 3:50 pm
I been vloggin’
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 4:12 pm
Yea a vlog is a video blog…Santa needs to get me one of those cute little flip cams first, then I’ll show you vlog!
sunnydelyte21 Reply:
December 16th, 2009 at 11:38 am
oh okay!
I’m sorry Tee, after being married as long as I have. I can only tell you what sexy ain’t (LOL). But I’ll leave that one alone. Sexy to me is a woman who knows but acts like she doesn’t know. Or at least holds back on letting a man know just how much she actually knows. Sexy or sexiness is embodied in a woman who is able to give off and protect a certain air of mystery.
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 11:24 am
lol stop giving me the wrong impression about marriage Rippa!!!!!
I’m feeling that definition..keyword: Mystery
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In my opinion, sexy is how you carry yourself, not only in the physical sense, but in your aura. I once wore the same slutty outfit as a friend and I never got pinched on the butt like she did or “psst pssst lemme holla atchu?!” I got, “Excuse me miss lady, can please have a moment of your time?”
I have a rule also with dressing, if my legs are showing my breasts aren’t and vice versa. I absolutely agree with Rippa, you should know you’re sexy, but don’t act like it. I have a friend who I think is beautiful, but if you say so to her, her response is, “I know right?” That to me is ridiculously ugly and a turn off.
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 12:33 pm
Omg I know of folks like that who love to openly declare that they are sexy…its funny try not complimenting these type of people the next time you’re around them…they will break down or feel uneasy.
To me if you need a compliment or to hear the word sexy to validate your “sexiness” you have self-esteem issues big time.
To me a real compliment is not ncessarily going to come in the form of a cat call but in the form of action,approach, and the type of reaction you get,like the example above you gave of the sexy outfit.
I dont know if I’m alone in thinking this way but I feel like any disrespectful approaches means I’m generating a disrespectful or weak energy…I know, I know that cant always be the case as there are some fellas with no sense..but generally if u approach me ass out w no manners, no game that to me triggers something to me & I got to ask myself these questions…a)what kind of enivronment am I in?
b) Am I sending out a message suggesting that I invite this bullshit?
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Nik Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 5:52 pm
You’re right, there are guys out there with not a lick of sense, so you can’t blame yourself or your energy for attracting them.
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sunnydelyte21 Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 12:45 pm
True indeed.
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Sexy. Hmmmmmm
I’m too weird. Sexy can be expressed soooooo many ways. I like someone that can talk it without it becoming excessive TMI. Yet a female that can make a bj joke is cute….to a degree.
I don’t know. The sexy meter is odd for me.
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 1:04 pm
There’s a sexy meter…in-ter-esting.
So is TMI one of your not-so-sexyisms?
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Nightfall Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 1:13 pm
Depends. Like if a female friend is telling me about a situation and I know the guy she’s speaking of then I don’t wanna know too much.
Now if she’s hypothetically telling me that “giving turns her on more then receiving” or That she finds the dick “beautiful” than we’re ok.
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Agreed, adult imagery is powerful and hella sexy…
sunnydelyte21 Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 2:35 pm
Cute @ Now if she’s hypothetically telling me that “giving turns her on more then receiving” or That she finds the dick “beautiful” than we’re ok.
I bet you would be okay with that…LOL
Nightfall Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 3:51 pm
Yeah….I’d be able to deal with that.
Sexy to me has to do with the intellect. For a woman to be able to spit intelligently about politics, sports, history, linked data, semantics, net neutrality, how many times her muscles contract in the span of a minute at the height of pleasure, or anything where one really uses their mental really turns me on….
Intelligent conversation is hella sexy….
Anyone who tries to hard to be sexy makes it really un-sexy and a sho nuff turn off…
Thin line btwn sexy and slutty.. So very true.. Personally, I like to cross the line every now and then, just to keep it interesting…
Too slutty for me is when you have had sex or sexual acts with someone else(or just the thought of it) then you want to be with me… *Gross*
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 9:48 pm
I moistened as I read this.
Stats & facts are def a turn on!
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Roderick Reply:
December 15th, 2009 at 11:02 pm
Me Too….
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Deion Reply:
January 8th, 2010 at 3:59 pm
I agree 100. Intellect = sexy
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Awesome posts!!! Girl the line between slutty and sexy is very fine. I wish more women knew that. I liked how Nik said if her boobies are out her legs are covered. I dress like that also. I hate seeing women with everything just jiggling everywhere. LOL
To me sexy is a man who has goals. I am more concerned with who he will become than who he is at the present time. I love a great conversation even though I hate starting them.
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Hmmmm….
Well, I will have to agree that there is indeed a thin line between slutty and sexy. Yet, this line is quite obvious.
A woman who is sexy, does this natrually as you stated. Homegirl can be in a sweatshirt and baggy jeans yet still both men AND women in the room are automatically drawn to her. They seek her attention. They seek her confirmation. Men want to fuck her and Women want to be her……
Now, let’s say this same naturally sexy woman were to enter a club wearing a red SKIN TIGHT dress with fuckem’ pumps on and red lipstick. She struts over to the bar, orders vodka on the rocks, and she’s lip-syncing one of Prince’s best damn songs……shall she perceived as a SLUT?
Hell no! Why not? Because her every move is REAL. Her every move FLOWS. From everything she says to everything she does….it appears as if she does it all with little to no effort at all. She knows she’s sexy, because she was born that way. Women AND men ENVY her. Some may hate her, yet they can’t honestly scream SLUT her way…because the entire room would look at them in utter confusion and they would take up for the woman in red…….
NOW, if “Supa Head” was to walk up in that same damn club, with that same damn SKIN TIGHT red dress and all the other shit I mentioned, you can bet ya bottom dollar if someone in the room screamed SLUT!!!!…seconds later someone would walk up to her and make her an offer on her services…asking how much can $100 gettem’. Why? B/C a woman like “Supa Head” looks slutty. Her self-esteem is low and her insecurities are repulsive. Her everymove seems forced! Nothing she says nor does seems natural at all…….
Forever Fabulous,
Dame
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goddessintellect Reply:
December 17th, 2009 at 7:10 am
I have to co-sign on your every word.
Cause some women can walk around half naked but they demand and get respect…so Its not always about covering yourself and being modest. You can still be a prostituta in sweats and get a dogged out approach all the the time.
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LOL @ you fishing for compliments..ROFL yeah you write and post pics…LOL
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goddessintellect Reply:
January 12th, 2010 at 5:51 pm
Hey Lexicon of Love,
How u doing?
Interesting you feel as though I am fishing for compliments…
If I get them, I am appreciative…even when I get negative feedback I’m appreciative.
The point of the shoot was not to fish for any type of approval from anyone but myself. I look at the photos, untouched, unaltered and I’m in love.
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