Thus far I have not laid icing sugar on the fact that during the tumultuous times with Mr. Cohabitation I cheated. I’m pretty sure the same exchange was happening in his side of the world as well. But now that I’m reflecting on that time in my life I believe that my emotional cheating far outweighed the physical stuff, although at the time the opposite was true. Cheating was the only thrill I would allow myself to feel, how sad.
My definition of emotional cheating is withholding intimacy from your partner and spouse and redirecting those feelings into other people, places or things.
I surrounded myself with distractions. I worked long hours on purpose, I spent a lot of time with the puppy, I poured energy into caring for my little sister ushering her from activity to activity on a daily basis. I went on giggle binges with my best friend. I dedicated time to everything but the issue that needed fixing.
In the last few months of the longest 7 years of my life things changed dramatically, my sister no longer lived with me and I had to face the music. One distraction was removed from my life and my desire for change began to tug at my soul.
One evening I sat in the car with someone I’ll call mystery man. I had gone 6 months without stepping out or even being sexually ignited at all to frantically trying to dry my hair before stepping back into the apartment. I demanded that mystery man not drop me too close so I had time to walk off my lies.
Mystery man had lectured me about this my situation earlier and I just wanted him to get out of my face. Who are you to tell me…
I felt like a tramp. The next day without hesitation I kicked Mr. Cohabitation out and made a toast to my new really, really single life.
The journey was far from over……..
My heart aches every time I read a letter from a reader who is caught up in a passion-deprived relationship. The feeling is so far yet familiar. You don’t have to answer below but have you ever or are currently emotionally cheating yourself of a quality relationship?
Withholding and suppressing intimacy is the complete opposite of love, so why dwell in it?
A few days left to register–> Save your spot in August’s online Relationship Vision Group Workshop
As a group we will discuss how to:
* Overcome commitment phobia
* Break unhealthy relationship patterns
* Meet your unique emotional needs without coming across as thirsty
* Earn respect you deserve in your relationships by reinforcing your personal boundaries
The best part…..you can choose to remain 110% ANONYMOUS!Interested? —> email: firstname.lastname@example.org (please feel free to share with your friends)
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