I’m a member of the late twenties bombshell crew and one thing I’ve noticed is that many of us are slowing down and coupling up. It’s around this age that we start thinking ahead and getting focused on what we want in life- true story. It’s common for women to want to start families, marry or both. Before you go assuming that this is another one of those posts where I tell you he’s not serious about your behind so leave, think again.
I sympathize with my male counterparts. Sure some lag behind in the whole independent living thing but I see you and what you’re working towards. It’s 2012 and ladies we are not growing up in the same world our parents did. Love is patience.
There are so many choices we are given to customize our lifestyles that generations previous to us did not have. I am grateful but at the same time it has created an impatient generation of emotional brats.
One of the most common complaints I hear from those coupled up is that dude just doesn’t get it. He keeps dancing around the idea of marriage or children and he’s too damn comfortable.
He’s taking too long, I don’t see where this relationship is going. I don’t want to be in the same boat later on down the road. What if he never steps up to the plate?!
Could it occur to you that you are also not ready for such a big lifestyle altering change? Just because something triggers hunger panes to your biological clock doesn’t necessarily mean you need to start popping out babies. The same as cravings are an indication of malnourishment of the pleasure-seeking part of the brain and not necessarily needed for survival.
Many times what stops a dude from taking it to the next level is your faith in him. He’s kept you satisfied for this long and at some point you were invested but now it’s not good enough. Believe me I love getting my way, so I can relate but instead of pushing for the play observe the court for a second.
Part of coaching and being a supportive partner is working with what is currently happening in the game by supporting the flow of things as opposed to drafting new plays on the sideline watching all the action go by. Perfect the system you have now. Have faith in your future. Have faith in each other. Have faith in your choice of partner.
What types of things do you look for in a long term partner? Would you be willing to stick by them while they work on building a better life even if it may not necessarily involve you? If so, for how long do you stick it out?
Updated (Jan.10.2013): Register for the 8-week Relationship Vision Group Workshop starting in last week of January 2013. Send a quick email to firstname.lastname@example.org for more info.